Some may have read the above as “D Day” and you may feel this is a correct representation of Valentines Day while others may feel like a kid before Christmas waiting to see what flowers, chocolates and cards they are going to get.
In my experience, I have always disliked Valentine’s Day. The last sentence is an understatement. Why would I despise it so much? I mean, I had been married at 22 and had boyfriends throughout my school years. It is not like I was single for most of my life.
However, I have always felt this weirdness leading up to this day or on the day. When I was a kid I always had this annoying feeling. I am not sure why.
In elementary school we would craft our own little ‘mailbox’ for other kids to put their Valentines Day cards in. No doubt glitter was involved. If you were really lucky you would get those heart shaped chalk candies that say something like “You’re the best” or “Be my Valentine” or “Here is a piece of disgusting chalk, chew on this.” You had to write one for every kid. I remember as a young girl thinking, “I don’t want to put this stupid snoopy card that asks Bob to be mine.” What does that even mean? I was 7 for god sake. Go away Johnny, I ain’t kissing you! AND NO, little David, I don’t want to be your Valentine, you pick your nose. (Disclaimer, not real names of boys I don’t like or pick their nose).
As I got older I would like to say my annoyance dissipated. It did not. It grew.
Maybe it is because I am a “snowflake” (according to some that I can say, hand on heart, I don’t care about their opinions of me) or maybe it is because I saw my single friends feel like shit and ‘less than’ and ‘unloved’ because they didn’t have that special someone to buy them red roses, or a box of surprise chocolates. You know the kind. The ones you bite into only to find the surprise of disgusting red goo slime or yellow fluffy toothpaste filling. What a delight.
Side note: My husband at the time would get annoyed with me as I would shove my thumb through the bottom of them. If it was not caramel or hard chocolate, he would get the thumb smashed ones.
Oh and let us not forget the random card with little teddy bears on it that proclaims how loved you are.
Listen, I am not trying to be a Debbie downer here. I am merely expressing my disgust at a made up ‘holiday’ that makes people feel like shit or the “lucky ones” who feel loved and appreciated on that one special day. The day that someone said (probably the card company or a florist) is an important day in February. That’s all.
Oh and Happy Valentine’s Day!
As I have gotten older, I still see some single people feel sad, lonely, unloved, on this “special” stupid day. Mostly women because somehow society tells women they must be in a relationship to be valuable or worthy. Who knows. I am sure some men feel this too. I have also talked to women who feel empowered and understand their value is not in a relationship and being single is completely and totally amazing.
Nonetheless, I see widows feeling even more empty and lost without the love of their life. A ‘not so gentle’ reminder they will not be receiving a card, gift, jewellery, or chocolates from their loved one. They will not go out for that romantic dinner or in this current situation, a take-away dinner because of a worldwide plague.
I see men (and women) standing at the card aisle section of the store on February 14th, because obviously you can’t come home empty handed. Standing, staring, head scratching, or just wanting to pick the first stupid card with teddy bears, hearts and GLITTER, that will never leave your carpet, hair, face, any surface of your home, ever ever ever again. Glitter is Satan’s fairy dust, by the way. These poor people just want to go home after a long day of work and eat.
I am that person.
The pressure on those who are in a relationship to buy something or they’re in the doghouse seems so insane to me. Maybe it’s just me? But maybe not.
Why not buy a card, or flowers, or chocolates or whatever on a random Tuesday just because? Or as a single person just go buy flowers to brighten up your house or buy a box of chocolates because….well….you goddamn deserve it!
Snowflake here (raises hand)….
For those who are hurting on V Day and the lead up to it, I see you.